1853 c/o Jacob Cain

You had left for Scotland
on the Wednesday. The next time we spoke
you were in Vatersay. You said
“I feel comfortable here.
It reminds me that some people
are more lonely than me.”

I will never know why you hadn’t told me
about this loneliness before.
Am I to blame
for not noticing your hollow smile.

When we first met,
just after you arrived from Canada,
you were mentally sturdy
enough to carry me.

I had never met anyone before
who could rebuild someone else,
as quickly as you did.
I don’t think I ever thanked you.

I will never know why you didn’t let me
try and rebuild you.
Am I to blame
for not noticing your skeleton start to frown.

On Saturday I was informed
that you had left me completely,
Not everyone can withstand the waves,
Especially those who no longer want to.

Your body was found washed up on West Beach.
They said I could come
and say goodbye. I couldn’t
see you with all the life removed.

I loved you Annie Jane.
I will never know if you still loved me.