1629 c/o Omar De Col

Ernesto the handsome Spanish soldier returns
victorious from the Battle of St Kitts and attempts to
have sex with Isabella the beautiful Spanish aristocrat
but is thwarted by women’s fashion circa 1629

“I’m really hot right now Ernesto!”

“O dios Isabella, you are so beautiful, I want you really hard right now!”

“Take me Ernesto, take me!”

Ernesto unties Isabella’s overcoat.

Ernesto kisses Isabella’s cheek.

Ernesto removes Isabella’s hat.

Ernesto pulls off Isabella’s gloves.

Isabella kisses Ernesto’s mouth.

Ernesto begins to unbutton Isabella’s dress.

“Oh be careful Ernesto…”

Ernesto unbuttons Isabella’s dress more slowly.

Ernesto is still unbuttoning Isabella’s dress.

Ernesto removes Isabella’s dress.

Isabella kisses Ernesto on the neck.

Ernesto removes Isabella’s shoes.

Ernesto unclasps Isabella’s stockings.

Each clasp snaps loudly.




Ernesto sees Isabella’s bare leg.

Ernesto has an erection.

Ernesto begins to untie Isabella’s corset.

Ernesto is still untying Isabella’s corset.

“Hurry up Ernesto! Dios mio!”

Ernesto removes Isabella’s corset.

Ernesto sees Isabella’s breasts.

Ernesto has a serious erection.

Isabella is naked.

Ernesto kisses Isabella’s neck.

Ernesto keeps kissing downwards.

Ernesto reaches Isabella’s belly button and feels something metallic on his chin.

Ernesto looks down and realises Isabella is wearing a chastity belt.

"O dios! Isabella! What the heck is this?! Jesus."

"Oh... Just stick it in."

Ernesto looks at the chastity belt.

"No way, it looks like a bear trap."

Isabella leans over and grabs Ernesto's face in both her hands.

Isabella looks into Ernesto's eyes and grins.

"Well, it's not like you're a bear..."

Ernesto interprets this as a crack at the size of his penis.

Ernesto storms out of the room shouting "YOU'RE A REAL WISEGUY ISABELLA!"